What I woke up to....

I woke up this morning to a snowy scene. A couple centimeters of fresh snow. It was beautiful and not unexpected for April. It's also supposed to reach 15 C and sunny this week. This is typical for spring in the near north.

I've been doing relatively well health-wise since overcoming my third cold virus of the winter. I've also been recovering from my trip south.

Overall, my energy has been OK with milder flu symptoms. I haven't been pushing it at all.

I wake up each morning and spend 1 - 2 hours working on my research proposal (in bed). It was due a week ago (thank-you doctor's note and subsequent extension).

Then I piddle around...rest in bed, eat a little, rest, watch TV, rest, play a game or two online. Not a very exciting existence, but do-able.

No side effects yet from the anti-viral - although I'm on an extremely low dose to start.

I was feeling well enough (maybe 50%) last night that I went to a one hour choral concert with my roommate. I made it through most of it, we left before the final number - I was feeling too wiped to make it all the way through.

Today I woke up feeling like I had.....well....M.E./CFS.

Similar to a very severe case of the flu along with weakness and the shakes (from weakness). Symptoms (throat, headache, painful lymph nodes, dizzy spells) are mild compared to the flu, but malaise (sick feeling) and weakness much worse. And it hurts to breathe (like I breathed in a lot of water) as per usual with a crash.

And immediately I plummet into depression. How do I endure another day of this? Really!!?? Seriously!

I talked to my specialist about being so down this winter and she thinks it's a case of what she calls reactive depression. She thinks if we can get me feeling better, the depression will also abate. It makes sense because on the days I'm not as sick, I am able to feel hopeful....its' just these awful sick days - days when I'm especially fluey.