You notice energy expenditure a lot more when you have M.E./cfs

I haven't posted much lately. It's a combination of being busy and the dial-up. Everything takes longer with dial-up. As well, I spend a lot less time online as we need to leave the phone line open once in a while (hee hee).

I had a big paper for the class I'm taking due on Monday and for the first time in my whole scholastic career, I asked for an extension. I was sick quite a number of days last week and prepping for and teaching my class along with the weekly time commitment the class I'm taking involves has left me with little time and energy to put towards a paper.

In the summer when I attempted the intense July course I figured it was a matter of getting through it, not having a major relapse, and then my fall schedule would lighten up.

However, work-wise, my fall is no less intense than my summer. The good thing is that I only have to go to the University 2 days a week for a few hours. And even though Sue has been driving me in and picking me up I find the travel exhausting (It's a 1/2 drive from the cabin). And it adds to my "out of the house" time. I just notice that if I can do things at home and in bed or on the couch I can last A LOT longer than when I'm not at home. I don't know why being out of the house is so much more draining. I'm not really an introvert and I have no social anxiety issues or anything like that. I just think it must be that things just take more energy when I'm out - e.g. walking down a hallway, having a conversation, siting at a desk instead of laying on a couch to work. It's these little things that take energy, that before I was sick, I never noticed.

Last week while working on the paper, I once again contemplated my options. There's dropping out of the PhD, taking a medical leave, and dropping the course I'm taking and trying it again next year....For now, I decided to stick with it....but my decision to continue is precarious. Once again, I think if I make it through the fall, the winter will be a lot more low key as I'm taking an independent study and I won't be teaching.

The lake is beautiful everyday. We still don't have a house rental for November so we might be here another month. This doesn't bother me at all because the extra driving is made up for with the beauty of this place and how it is feeding my soul....

Stay tuned for my next blog where I'll discuss the break-in we had the other night. Hint: the thieves were black, furry and feasted on dog food (they would have also enjoyed the garbage if they'd grabbed it).