Well it turns out I spoke too soon about the improvement and resilience. It happens every time. It doesn't take away from the fact that I had some good days. But after my travel, while I did alright for 2 days, on the 3rd day I collapsed. I am feeling so ill and fluey and even headachey that I can barely stand it. And it's even harder to feel this way while being on a visit because I can't escape indefinitely into bed (although that's what I'm dong for the most part).
As you know, when you have M.E. and are crashed, it's even hard to talk as talking takes so much energy and makes you feel worse. I think I am going to need a year to recover.
This morning I got a ride to the senior home where my Aunt is living. There was a big scare recently when she went into heart failure. Everyone thought it was the end. Then she bounced back like a cat with nine lives! Needless to say, I really really wanted to see her while I was here, so I went and enjoyed an hour visit. But I felt so ill by the end I wanted to just die. And that has been the story of my last 4 days. Feeling awful and very "viral" and weak and exhausted. On top of it all, frustrated with my body for rebelling so fiercely to the most simple things.
Even small things I want to do (short visits or hellos, sitting up at the the dinner table with my parents) seem like monumental tasks and I am at the edge of tears constantly. (Probably somewhat just from fatigue). Cross your fingers this is short lived.
So sorry, upnorth. Yes, hoping it is soon gone.
ReplyDeleteHi Upnorth, I feel so badly for you and so mad at this illness. We pay for everything !! omg, talking one on one to someone for an hour, I know what it's like. Talking exhaustion which then leads to further body symptoms, was one of my first ME cfs signs over a decade ago. And you were so kind to go see your aunt. Maybe you are home by now, able to stay in bed and recover from this setback. Even the energy it takes to cry depletes one. My fingers are crossed for you.
ReplyDeletefrom Leah
So sorry to hear that, upnorth.
ReplyDeleteIn 2009 early spring, I wrote a long essay to say good-by to my chronic illness, but it turned out I spoke too soon. My condition got worsened during late of 2009 and most of 2010. After I realized the diet was the key, it was another 2 years struggling.
My improvement this time so far is promising. It has been 35 days since I took herbs, I had two small crashes due to my over-estimating my energy, but overall I am feeling better each day.
I wonder if you would like to try some herbs. I know what's good for one person may not be good for other person, but some herbs are not for one specific disease but help overall immune system. I found that astragalus which helped me this time can increasing white blood cell function. I believe that what really made me feel so much stronger these few weeks.
http://www.smart-publications.com/articles/astragalus-is-the-safe-and-effective-immune-system-enhancer
and it is so simple/cheap/safe to take it.
Of course it's your decision to make. Take care and get better soon!
Sorry to hear you have been feeling like this. It is not nice at all. Sending you lots of hugs and positive vibes. Fellow M.E sufferer and spoonie friend Hayley-Eszti x
ReplyDeletewww.hayleyeszti.blogspot.co.uk