This sickie can camp!

Well I just did something outrageous!....at least for someone who's mostly homebound and often in bed lying down (partly due to the ME, partly due to the OI).


I went wilderness camping.

As most of you know, my pre-M.E. career was outdoor educator/wilderness instructor working mostly with teens. I did this work for 9 years year-round. For 6 of those years between guiding trips and personal days I was probably out in the backcountry about 200 days a year.

Of course I miss it and there have been plans for me to go out almost every year since I got sick.

But either I was too sick to make it happen, or feeling like if I made it happen, I wouldn't even enjoy it due to feeling so ill.

While I was attending that course this summer I couldn't even sustain the 2 hours a day for four weeks. There were days as I lay in bed frustrated, sick, humiliated, that I thought, "Why am I putting myself through this?" "What am I gaining here?"

I had a kind of epiphany....I mean I can push myself hard with consequences, but why not do this for something I'll enjoy?

So I figured I'd try to "go out". My lovely housemate and friend realized I was planning to do this alone and decided to take her days off to go with me. She helped me make it happen.

So the three of us (dog included) went. In retrospect it worked much better having help. She drove us there as driving causes me to crash. I live in an area that is surrounded by lakes and wilderness/backcountry on all sides which makes for easy access. We picked a lake, launched the canoe and canoed until we found a campsite that would work. She paddled, I mostly steered.

We spent two nights camping which involved sitting on an island, resting in the tent....eating....sitting by the fire...sitting by the lake. Not too different from home in bed except I could hear the waves on the shore, the wind through the aspens, and the loons on the lake.

The only epic was the paddle back to the car as the waves picked up and I was forced to actually paddle with my weak shaky M.E. arms....I managed to rally and now can't use my arms (arms are crashed); however, that will pass.

I think this will have to be a yearly endeavour. While I'm crashed, I was before going too. I've been so depressed about my life that this little outing will give me something to smile about for a while. I think it worked partly because I prepared myself mentally that I would be sick out there.

Sometimes when I imagine myself in a different space, subliminally I don't imagine the illness coming with me. But preparing myself beforehand to expect this experience to be different from my "well" past helped. Still, there were a few surprises like a couple near faints from OI and legs that didn't work (were weak and shaky and unstable). Overall, though, a success....in fact, more successful than some trips to see friends and family where the travel and social is so draining.