Four Days Down

I've been crashed for four days...not long you say? It feels like forever. Perhaps because the last 15 years of my life have been a series of crash days piled upon crash days piled upon relapses.  It's hard to remember the "not" crashed days when you are living the crash days, although I am thankful that I have the "crappy" days where I'm at least not too sick to live a little.

I'm not sure why I'm crashed? It could be PEM, but I can't put my finger on an over-do.  I did finish my marking last week so maybe my body was "holding out" until I was done the winter course.

Sometimes I have an M.E. crash - weakness with viral symptoms - if there's an infection going around.  I don't "catch" the infection, I just get the M.E. flare/crash.  Anyways, I can barely lift my arms or stand right now and I'm out of breath walking around the house.  It hurts to take a deep breath or talk, especially in the afternoons.  I've been avoiding people, I just don't have the energy.  I'm like a gas tank with literally nothing but fumes.

Despite this, I just forced myself outside with the dog for some air.  I've probably "sat up" for a total of one or two hours the last 4 days - pathetic! I live in bed or splayed on the couch.

My spring course starts next Monday, so no 'mental' rest for the weary.

I woke up to around 4 cm of snow on the ground this morning.  It's supposed to be cold with flurries and/or rain most the week. At least if I remain crashed the sun/spring weather won't mock me as I lay here.

Can you believe my pal Teagan turned nine this week! How time with our canine companions flies.

Me and Teags last fall