Well I decided I just may try to do some PhD work this fall. As my one roommate will have a schedule again, I figured it might be quiet enough around here for me to both rest and fit in a few hours a week of "at home" reading and writing.
So I registered online, and then today looked into re-instating my funding. It turns out this is something I have to do at least 8 weeks prior to starting back up.
Decision made!
After an awful week it was a big sigh of relief to be honest. I think it was some kind of "meant to be" thing. But then the scientist in me says, "Well, it's that you were so unenthused about trying to work while feeling ill that you didn't do your homework". Either way, it amounts to me having another semester of medical leave.
I've been feeling so weak and fluy. Despite this, I have been pushing to do a few things that seem really important right now. Nothing exorbitant, just stuff that has me out of bed an hour or two more than usual.
I had a really bad cold two weeks ago and it definitely triggered this decline. As the cold eased up, the M.E. got worse. It happens to me about half the time when I get a virus.
The bad sick patch is also messing with my mood as per usual (I'm feeling both very sick and very down). And to be honest, really alone.
Wow...I don't even know what to say. This has to be so hard to be back so sick after yet another virus threw you off course. So sorry, friend. You are in my thoughts and prayers as you begin once again to repair and restorein rest.
ReplyDeleteThanks Renee, I'm managing I guess. I feel good that there's no pressure to do anything but rest.
ReplyDeleteyou are not alone - remember that.
ReplyDeleteglad you followed your heart and made decision. so sorry about your being so sick again. hope things change soon.
ReplyDeleteSo sorry you're not doing well :( I made a decision about 3 years ago to forgo going to grad school after I dragged myself through applications and interviews and got accepted because, as much as it tore me apart, I knew deep down that I shouldn't do that to myself. That big sigh of relief you feel is probably a big indicator that deep down you know the same. It's hard to keep ourselves from...well, being ourselves and pushing forward and striving for things, but maybe that's the best thing for us. I hope this semester off does you a world of good! Hugs!
ReplyDeletesorry i re-read the first part again and realized that you would have another medical leave. good for you. yes, it means to be that way. i hope you condition would improve soon.
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