Before becoming ill, I read some. I was mostly reading non-fiction accounts of polar expeditions and dog sled races with the occasional novel thrown in. Since becoming ill I read quite a lot. It's something low energy I can do lying in bed and I also read to put myself to sleep at night.
My favourite books fall into two categories. The first category is novels that make me think differently in some way. Perhaps they offer a perspective I've never considered, for example. The story/plot has to be good and fairly quick moving and most importantly the characters and relationships real. My other favourite genre is teen and young adult fantasy. Bizarre, I know. I'm not sure why but it started with the Harry Potter books (I've read the whole series more than 7 times) and branched out from there.
Most of the books I read this year were good, a few were just great. I bolded my 5 favourites of the year.
*1. Great Expectations - Charles Dickens
*2. The Flying Troutmans - Miriam Toews
3. The Lightning Thief - Rick Riordan
4. The Sea of Monsters - Rick Riordan
5. Gods Behaving Badly - Marie Phillips
6. Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban
7. The Titan's Curse - Rick Riordan
8. The Battle of the Labyrinth - Rick Riordan
9. The Last Olympian - Rick Riordan
10. The wolves of Algonquin Park: A 12 year ecological study - Theberge and Theberge
11. Rainbow Boys - Alex Sanchez
12. Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince - J.K. Rowling
13. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows
14. Little Bee - Chris Cleave
15. The Summer of My Amazing Luck - Miriam Toews
16. The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo - Karl Stig-Erland Larsson
17. The Middle Place - Kelly Corrigan
18. Anansi Boys - Neil Gaimon
19. Pigs in Heaven - Barbara Kingslover
20. Slam - Nick Hornby
21. When You Are Engulfed in Flames - David Sedaris
22. I am the Messenger - Markus Zusak
23. The Gin & Tonic Gardener - Janice Wells
24. Over Sea, Under Stone - Susan Cooper
25. The Dark is Rising - Susan Cooper
26. The Magician - Michael Scott
27. Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets - Rowling
28. The Forgotten Garden - Kate Morton
29. The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society - Mary Ann Shaffer and Annie Barrows
30. Graceling - Kristin Cashore
31. The Brief Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao - Junot Diaz
32. Of Wolves and Men - Barry Lopez
33. Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix - JK Rowling
*34. Ordinary Wolves - Seth Kantner
35. Speak - Laurie Halse Anderson
36. Secret Daughter - Shilpi S. Gowda
37. Mister Pip - Lloyd Jones
38. Mocking Jay - Suzanne Collins
39. Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire - Rowling
*40. Super Sad True Love Story - Gary Shteyngart
41. Red Bird - Mary Oliver
42. Tomorrow When the War Began. - John Marsden
43. The Astonishing Life of Octavian Nothing, Traitor to the Nation, Volume I: The Pox Pary - M.T. Anderson
44. The Dead of Night - John Marsden
45. The Third Day, The Frost - Marsden
46. Darkness, Be My Friend - Marsden
47. Burning for Revenge - Marsden
48. The Night is for Hunting - Marsden
49. The Other Side of Dawn - Marsden
50. Drug Letting and Miraculous Cures - Vincent Lam
51. A Christmas Carol - Charles Dickens
*52. Lullabies for Little Criminals - Heather O'Neill
53. Dress your Family in Corduroy and Denim - David Sedaris
54. Sarah's Key - Tatiana De Rosnay
55. Incarceron - Catherine Fisher
56. Artemis Fowl: The Lost City - Eoin Colfer
Tuesday, December 28, 2010
Tuesday, December 21, 2010
Specialist Appointment
I saw my specialist. It was a good appointment, but as always, it seemed too short. Since I'm down south visiting family for a week (where there is a Gama lab) she decided to run a whole slew of tests on me- infections, flow cytometry, WBC etc. It will be interesting to see if anything comes of it.
I'm quite busy visiting family (including my 5 and 6 year old nephew and niece). I hope I don't have to spend weeks recovering from this visit. Fingers crossed.
Dizziness is improved, still having occasional nausea and vomiting.
I hope everyone is doing OK....sorry I haven't had much time to read and comment on blogs.
To all those who celebrate, Merry Christmas.
I'm quite busy visiting family (including my 5 and 6 year old nephew and niece). I hope I don't have to spend weeks recovering from this visit. Fingers crossed.
Dizziness is improved, still having occasional nausea and vomiting.
I hope everyone is doing OK....sorry I haven't had much time to read and comment on blogs.
To all those who celebrate, Merry Christmas.
Saturday, December 11, 2010
spinning holiday cards
I thought I'd share my homemade holiday cards. I say holiday, because not all of the people I send them to necessarily celebrate Christmas. I send them in December (if I've been up to carving and printing something). The spruce one doesn't come out too well here, but it turned out OK enough that I'm sending it. The raven is a print I did over a year ago and reprinted on the press in November. Yes, a little bleak for a holiday card, but I like it and I sent it to folks who I figured would like it as well.
Health wise I'm not at my worst, although I'm not feeling great either. It seems the last two years I've been living on this plateau where I go through ups and downs but don't see any worsening or improving in my condition overall.
My concern the last few days (besides the sicky influenzaishache/chest ache) is I'm dealing with both OI (orthostatic intolerance - hypotension) and also a type of vertigo I get. My head feels full and if I look at anything more distant (like the birds out the window or the TV from the couch) I get a minor, disconcerting spinning sensation. If I'm looking at something that moves, the vertigo is definitely worse. It's like being mildly drunk. I'm wondering if anyone out there gets this and if so, whether you have any advice for me? I seem to be able to do short computer stints and some reading. It bothers me most if I'm moving or something in the distance is moving. I've had bouts of this vertigo since I got sick. Mostly I'm just laying in bed - resting and reading with the lighting low. I hope it goes away soon.
Monday, December 6, 2010
Cycles
For whatever reason, I often post when I'm feeling pretty sick.
Usually in the afternoon on a bad day. The last two days I've been feeling decent and I've been out of the house both days. So I thought I'd post now rather then when the crash hits (if it does).
I think I write when I'm feeling especially sick because it's a release .....as many of you who read this know through personal experience, there can be a cathartic effect when writing about how difficult it is to suffer chronic illness. Sometimes after writing, I feel like I've let go of something, but also that I may have connected - that I'm not alone, and I've sent my voice out into the great universe (or Internet as the case may be).
Morning is my best time of day. I always feel the least sick about an hour after I wake up. This is usually the time when I do some work if I have some to do (reading, editing, marking, writing).
My experience with this illness is an experience of cycles.
I have daily cycles - morning OK (or least sick) with increasing fatigue over the end of the morning into the afternoon, usually peaking in the 3-5 pm period. After 6pm I start to pick up a bit. I feel better than the afternoon, but still sicker than the a.m.
During the week I also have good and bad days...this can relate to how much I've been doing and if I crash, generally it's about 36 hours after an activity.
Then there's the yearly cycle...I got sick on the weekend of June 15th, 2002 and for the first several years during the fall I thought I was "getting better" only to be thrown into some-kind of relapse later in the winter. After 8 years I think I have enough evidence to support my observation that I seem to pick up every fall and then get worse sometime in the winter (late Dec., January, or Feb). My worst months generally seem to be March and or April.
For as long as I can remember, I've felt a connection and draw towards the natural world. I don't need to go into a history of me, but I spent much of my childhood outdoors playing in the fields, ponds and woods near our home. This love and passion led me to pursue degrees in outdoor recreation and natural science as well as a career in outdoor environmental education (for 8 of those years as a wilderness guide working mostly with youth).
As someone who spent so many years outdoors, I was (and still am - although less so) aware of nature's many cycles. The cycles of the moon and the sun for instance, or the cycle of the seasons. If you stop to think about it, we live in a world of circles or cycles. The earth cycles (rotates) and revolves (circles) around the sun. Life itself is a cycle - birth through death - and when things die and decay they serve to nourish other forms of life through their circle.
So I guess it doesn't surprise me, looking at the big picture, that whatever this illness is, I experience it in cycles. And I'm not alone. Sue at "learning to live with CFS" http://livewithcfs.blogspot.com/2010/12/laura-hillenbrand-in-elle.html
was mentioning a similar daily pattern to mine on her blog last week. However, there seems to be all kinds of variety within the M.E. community. People, for instance who never feel well, or never seem to have a "better" time of day or month. Or others who have an opposite daily pattern to mine - that is, they feel sicker in the morning and best in the afternoon.
If and when this illness ever gets figured out, I don't expect we'll all end up classified as having the same disease. In fact, I barely fit some of the descriptions as it is. I was diagnosed in the U.S.A. with the Fukunda criteria and then when I moved back to Canada with the Canadian Clinical Definition. But when I look at it, it's a stretch http://www.cfids-cab.org/MESA/ccpccd.pdf (for example, my neurocognitive issues are minor and I have no pain outside of throat and lymph nodes).
Usually in the afternoon on a bad day. The last two days I've been feeling decent and I've been out of the house both days. So I thought I'd post now rather then when the crash hits (if it does).
I think I write when I'm feeling especially sick because it's a release .....as many of you who read this know through personal experience, there can be a cathartic effect when writing about how difficult it is to suffer chronic illness. Sometimes after writing, I feel like I've let go of something, but also that I may have connected - that I'm not alone, and I've sent my voice out into the great universe (or Internet as the case may be).
Morning is my best time of day. I always feel the least sick about an hour after I wake up. This is usually the time when I do some work if I have some to do (reading, editing, marking, writing).
My experience with this illness is an experience of cycles.
I have daily cycles - morning OK (or least sick) with increasing fatigue over the end of the morning into the afternoon, usually peaking in the 3-5 pm period. After 6pm I start to pick up a bit. I feel better than the afternoon, but still sicker than the a.m.
During the week I also have good and bad days...this can relate to how much I've been doing and if I crash, generally it's about 36 hours after an activity.
Then there's the yearly cycle...I got sick on the weekend of June 15th, 2002 and for the first several years during the fall I thought I was "getting better" only to be thrown into some-kind of relapse later in the winter. After 8 years I think I have enough evidence to support my observation that I seem to pick up every fall and then get worse sometime in the winter (late Dec., January, or Feb). My worst months generally seem to be March and or April.
For as long as I can remember, I've felt a connection and draw towards the natural world. I don't need to go into a history of me, but I spent much of my childhood outdoors playing in the fields, ponds and woods near our home. This love and passion led me to pursue degrees in outdoor recreation and natural science as well as a career in outdoor environmental education (for 8 of those years as a wilderness guide working mostly with youth).
As someone who spent so many years outdoors, I was (and still am - although less so) aware of nature's many cycles. The cycles of the moon and the sun for instance, or the cycle of the seasons. If you stop to think about it, we live in a world of circles or cycles. The earth cycles (rotates) and revolves (circles) around the sun. Life itself is a cycle - birth through death - and when things die and decay they serve to nourish other forms of life through their circle.
So I guess it doesn't surprise me, looking at the big picture, that whatever this illness is, I experience it in cycles. And I'm not alone. Sue at "learning to live with CFS" http://livewithcfs.blogspot.com/2010/12/laura-hillenbrand-in-elle.html
was mentioning a similar daily pattern to mine on her blog last week. However, there seems to be all kinds of variety within the M.E. community. People, for instance who never feel well, or never seem to have a "better" time of day or month. Or others who have an opposite daily pattern to mine - that is, they feel sicker in the morning and best in the afternoon.
If and when this illness ever gets figured out, I don't expect we'll all end up classified as having the same disease. In fact, I barely fit some of the descriptions as it is. I was diagnosed in the U.S.A. with the Fukunda criteria and then when I moved back to Canada with the Canadian Clinical Definition. But when I look at it, it's a stretch http://www.cfids-cab.org/MESA/ccpccd.pdf (for example, my neurocognitive issues are minor and I have no pain outside of throat and lymph nodes).
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